October 30th, 2001

zoot

Hahaha...

So... apparently everyone and their brother thinks I'm all set to commit suicide. I got called down to the Guidance office today during English. And here I thought it had something to do with my EO or my classes... -___-;; I entirely forgot that the Guidance office offers guidance. Aha... I'm a big dork.

Anyway. Got the schpeal about how killing myself would be a "bad thing". Yeah. He's going to call my dad too... which serves absolutely no purpose, as my father is already aware of it.

My counselor told me that several people had come to him expressing some sort of worry over me. How about that? I really wonder who. I would think Miss Atkins, but... other people? How very strange. *muses*

Oh well... here's my Rock Star poem that I typed up yesterday...

"Drug of Choice"

I just wanna be a-
I just wanna be
Amidst stage lights and wires and electricity that
HUMS
Like it's alive
And it's all around me, coiling around me
Snake-like, twisted, and strangling
Squeezing the chords out of me
Like the boa constrictor that it is
Heat and fire and light
Steel and metal
And a man beside me who grips his guitar
In exactly the same way I do
With nervous white knuckles and sighs
The crowd is like a living thing
Throngs of people moving in sickening waves
Churning
Undulating
Ever closer
Someday they'll come close enough to swallow me whole
Being onstage is like being a god
Even when you fade into the background
Jumping
Vibrating
Screaming
Like your skin has
Been torched.

I just wanna
Just wanna be
Be a Rock Star
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