January 1st, 2002


I hate to say this...

But I need to go back to school. Or get out of the house for a really long time. Say, seven hours? Eight hours? Because if I'm around my father for too long, I really start to hate him. And we argue. Except, as usual, it's just me arguing, because he doesn't notice. So then I get really pissy and anxious and I cut. And, instead of cutting because I'm nervous or scared, I'm cutting because I'm angry and that makes it more violent.

Ah! Jesus! He's made himself into a fucking cleaning machine. He's cleaning the damn oven now. And he wants me to start cleaning my room "a little bit every day". Ok, here's my response: fuck you. I'm artistic and I'm mentally ill (and not taking my pills, thankee...), so no shit I'm messy. Do not treat me like I'm five years old. If I want to clean, I will. When do you come up to my room? Two minutes every school day to make me wake up. Does it bother you so much? I live up there!

Oh, this is so stupid! Ahhh! This is the dumbest thing to be getting mad about and all I want to do is go cut something. I want to throw up.
  • Current Mood
    sick sick
diner friends


"Don't you dare call me that again until I have looked it up!" -Peter Sellers in "What's New, Pussycat?"
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    "What's New Pussycat?" on TCM

When you can't write...

Post a lot. ^^;; So far, tonight has yielded nothing. Nada. Zip. So, here's the first part of a little Aragorn/Legolas fic out there for scrutiny. Scrutinize away!

By the way... "Run For Your Life" is a song by the team of Lennon and McCartney, recorded by the Beatles. I like it. Forgive me, friends, for setting it upon the characters of Middle-earth.

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  • Current Music
    Nine Inch Nails - Closer