March 7th, 2003

squallxlaguna

I have feathers!

Turkey and something else feathers. Rawr.

Have fully convinced myself that I am expendable and uninteresting. How nice indeed.

I hate... stuff. Like freshman girls. Because I can't tell them apart. It's really super irritating. And they're all either... intimidated by me (unlikely) or think I'm weird and are being snobby (probably the case).

Why do I tend to get along with boys so well... but not with girls? Take going to Rome for instance. If I was given a choice of whom I wanted to room with... I'd probably want to room with Trevor and Michael. But, haha. Can't do that. Not that we'd do anything "inappropriate," as I'm not sexually attracted to them and they feel likewise toward me. (I think.) It's just... similar senses of humor and tastes and ideals. Instead, I have to room with girls who, while nice in their own right, will probably be a bit perplexed by me.

Or... take Matt, for instance. Matt is in my Latin class. When he actually shows up, we tend to have great conversations, as we're both pretty talkative people. And, as a bonus, he's very into LotR, so we babbled on and on about that last time we chatted. In a lot of ways, he's a guy that I could, conceivably, be attracted to. But... I dunno... he's Matt. I don't want to go out with Matt. I want to be friends with Matt. I like talking to Matt. I like talking to Trevor.

I seem to have solved the mystery of why I haven't had a date all through high school. I can't seem to muster up the interest.

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    frustrated frustrated