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05 June 2004 @ 07:52 pm
Marry me, Remus?  
I have now seen PoA.

Please keep in mind that I have been waiting more than FOUR YEARS to see Prisoner of Azkaban on the big screen. Thank you.


I liked David Thewlis as Remus. I hope I don't sound too much like I'm back-pedaling... I mean, I am, a little bit. My Remus and Alfonso Cuaron's Remus are clearly very different. And my Remus just happens to look more like Jeremy Irons. And don't give me that shit about, "Eh, you whine because he's not pretty enough, bleaurgh..." Because when Jeremy is unattractive, he is unattractive. The man can be downright ugly. It's wonderful. For a tired, lived-in sort of face, you can't go wrong with Jeremy Irons. Besides, David Thewlis can be a little bit pretty himself. Hehehe. That was such a godawful movie. My mother and I used to call him 'Clueless Thewlis.'

But, no. David Thewlis is Remus in this movie, and that's fine. He does a good job. His voice kind of grates on my ears, to be honest, but he plays Remus well as a character who walks the fine line between being a teacher and a friend for Harry. The scars across his face are superb and lovely, his transformation (much as I hate how the wolf looks) was quite nice, and his scene at the end with Harry was appropriately sad and pathetic. The cane and the limping were nice touches too. (I could have done without the shapeless, ugly sweater vests, though.) The tetchy scenes between him and Snape, few though they ended up being, were nonetheless highly amusing. In the few moments when you're not sure who is really the murderer and who is trustworthy (in the Shrieking Shack scene), Remus did come off as rather threatening, which makes me smile. (That "cleverest witch" line? Oh, wow, did that sound bitter and mean. It was awesome.)

So David Thewlis was good, and I am pleased. Moving on to Daniel Radcliffe... ohhhhh my yes. First of all, his acting has gotten much better. Second... the older he gets, the more startlingly lovely he gets. Occasionally, watching his scenes becomes a game of "rein your hormones in, kthx." His nostrils bug me, though. Oh, but his line, "Poor Professor Lupin's sure having a tough night!" or something to that effect...? OMG, adorable.

The Harry/Remus moments were there, and they were much better than I expected them to be. I kept waiting, in those little heart-to-heart scenes, for Remus to lean forward and cup Harry's chin and KISSIES!!! and then he'd say something about the chocolate taste squueeeeee. That's all I have to say about that. Seriously.

Buckbeak was cool. Hermione was far too kick-butt, which is sort of disappointing in its own way... I think it's because Emma Watson is so pretty? Something about movie!Hermione doesn't ring true for me, I'm afraid. I still love her, and someday I'll get myself a little Hermione doll and be pleased, but she's not... right. Uh... Gary Oldman did a good job, but I still hate Sirius. The James and Lily dancing picture? So cute.

All right, my biggest gripe is with how they did Scabbers. Isn't it sort of exasperating that, while they can do such a beautiful job animating something like Buckbeak (or even that wolf-thing that WAS NOT REMUS), they have such a tough time creating a convincing rat? I have nothing against puppets; they used puppets in Willard. But they also used CGI and REAL RATS. So Willard LOOKS LIKE IT'S A MOVIE FULL OF REAL RATS. Scabbers looked so fake. I was so ashamed.

Also, my father elbowed me when Scabbers bit Ron. Hey, at least my rat isn't an Animagus in hiding! I think...

And Ron didn't get to say his wonderfully creepy line! "I let you sleep in my bed!" Such a great line; it just makes you shudder.

[ETA Things That I Forgot: Emma Thompson is teh awesome and I tell no lies. When Harry was sitting on the sidewalk in front of the playground (right before he sees Sirius/THE GRIM) and the swings and the teeter-totter and all of that are moving by themselves... I totally started singing "Ring Around the Rosy" in a breathy little girl's voice. That was what that scene really needed, some creepy-ass children singing. It made me think of Pet Sematary, a little. I have no comment to make on Draco. No comment, whatsoever. Ron's spider dream was so cute. The Knight Bus scene was awesome, and the guy who played Stan Shunpike cracked me up right from the start. Also, little shrunken Rastafarian head! The sense of humor displayed in this movie was really wonderful and very welcome. And awesome.]

Conclusion: most of it was good, near perfect. One or two things bugged me. The end.

*waves little Harry/Remus flag* Whee! Whee!
 
 
Current Mood: blahblah
Current Music: Nirvana - You Know You're Right
 
 
 
electriboogaloo on June 5th, 2004 02:24 pm (UTC)
I loved that movie, so much. They're all 348975304987539874503750734057324057023475074098750827430895x more attractive. Did you like the new Dumbledore? I thought he did pretty good, but just wasn't the same. He was more animated!
DrWormdrworm on June 5th, 2004 02:37 pm (UTC)
It was such a good movie, so much better than the first two. ^^;; Although I'm terribly biased here, because PoA will always be my favorite of the Harry Potter books, I'm sure. Still, yeah, it was a very good movie.

And, I know, it was like everyone got sexy! It was kind of weird. Didn't they use to be cute and sweet? Now they're all... teenaged. It's crazy.

I did like the guy who played Dumbledore... Richard Harris was playing him with more of an authoritarian streak, while this guy played up the charming, twinkly aspects of Dumbledore. It was an interesting change, I guess. It's funny... I think it actually works both ways.
Your Momsilent_hotaru on June 5th, 2004 03:26 pm (UTC)
I thought everything was too rushed and a lot went unexplained or hardly touched-upon. And Ron's (I forget the actor's name) voice dropped, like Daniel Radcliffe's voice did between the first two movies. Isn't he 16 or something? He's starting to be cute. *hides from accusers of cradle-robbing*

And they never explained who made the Marauder's Map! It would have been so easy to include ten lines of dialogue explaining it, and it would have made an understandable connection between the stag-Patronus at the lake and why Harry thought he saw his Dad.

But I liked it otherwise.
DrWormdrworm on June 5th, 2004 03:33 pm (UTC)
I don't know... for whatever reason, I didn't think it was too rushed, but I was irked that they didn't explain the Maurauder's Map; I really expected it right at the end (I was waiting for Harry to call Professor Lupin back... "Wait, Professor, wait! You forgot to explain a major plot point!")

I was also mad that they took out all reference to the Wolfsbane Potion... except for that one stupid line of Hermione's: "He's not safe! He hasn't had his potion!" I mean, yeah, what potion would that be? Eh? Eh?

I think Daniel Radcliffe is still 14 and Rupert Grint is 16 or 17, I think. Yes, everyone is getting cute. *hides with you*
Your Momsilent_hotaru on June 5th, 2004 04:48 pm (UTC)
And you know, shouldn't things have gotten out of the way of the Knight Bus, not the other way around?!?
DrWormdrworm on June 5th, 2004 05:07 pm (UTC)
Uh... yes? But then I guess it wouldn't have been as funny. Or something like that.
Cathryn (formerly catslash)remindmeofthe on June 5th, 2004 04:01 pm (UTC)
Funny you should mention Willard in your review (although, really, after you've seen it, it's hard not to think of it whenever you see anything with rats in it), because I spent a disproportionate amount of time informing Scabbers that Ben could kick his ass. (This has become my response to any rat in moves or literature. "Hah, Ben could kick your ass and Socrates could think circles around you, so shut up.") Ben would have solved the problem before it was one.
DrWorm: savagedrworm on June 5th, 2004 04:26 pm (UTC)
Haha! Oh, I'm afraid that after seeing and fanning Willard and having rats of my own, I have become highly critical of rats portrayed in movies. I'll sit there and critique, saying things like, "Oh, that's not right, they don't move that way, a rat would never do that" etc. Which is always followed by, "Haven't these people seen the remake of Willard? Don't they see that it is possible to portray rodents in an accurate manner?"

Methinks I take it all too seriously. But I have no doubt that, were Ben in place of Scabbers, he would have done exactly what he'd been there to do, and possibly would have succeeded Voldemort, if given the chance. >_> All hail Ben?
Cathryn (formerly catslash)remindmeofthe on June 5th, 2004 05:18 pm (UTC)
. . . and possibly would have succeeded Voldemort, if given the chance.

Certainly. Ben's way smarter than Voldemort. Okay, so's a parakeet, but that's not the point. The point is that if Voldemort, who frankly gives your average cartoon villain a run for his money in the stupidity department ("My greatest enemy and the cause of my downfall is helpless before me! I know! Instead of killing him and erasing any threat he could pose in the future, I'll UNTIE AND ARM HIM!" "There are any number of ways I could disguise myself and retrieve the prophecy! I know! I'll come up with an elaborate, risky plan to avoid having to go to the Ministry building myself, and then show up on the premises anyway!" Lame-ass) can rise to such power, Ben could in a trice. And he could also keep it.

And Ben the Dark Lord would officially qualify as Coolest Thing Ever.
DrWorm: democrats suckdrworm on June 5th, 2004 06:40 pm (UTC)
Ben's way smarter than Voldemort. Okay, so's a parakeet, but that's not the point.

*snorts* Ohhh man. It's funny because it's so true. I mean, my god, you'd think that since her books are being received with so much critical acclaim and everyone is drawing their parallels left and right and everywhere in-between... well, you'd think that her villains would be, um, 'evil.' Right now they taste sort of like Diet Coke. Caffeine Free Diet Coke. So they're only sort of evil and stupid. Hello? JK? You have plenty of perfectly good real-world and historical role models to base your villain on. What are you doing watching Saturday morning cartoons when you should be writing? Hop to it, woman!

And I would totally kneel before Ben the Dark Lord. I'd have no choice; it's time a rat seized power anyway. ("He seized power in a bloodless coup! Aaaaall smothering!")
Cathryn (formerly catslash)remindmeofthe on June 6th, 2004 06:11 am (UTC)
It's frustrating, isn't it? Every other aspect of the books is so great, so the lameness of the villains is even more painful. (When someone who's basically on the good side, albeit in a creepy way - I am thinking here of Umbridge - is scarier than the villain, there's a problem.) I can only assume that the years spent inconveniently discorporated muddled Voldemort's brain, 'cos otherwise I can't imagine why people are so afraid of him. Sure, he's hella powerful, but he'd also probably buy a disguise that consisted of fake glasses (this looks like a job for . . . Superman!). It's not enough to be powerful, you also have to be smart enough to hold on to it. Voldemort would do well to study the Evil Overlord List. Read it, live it, know it.

Okay, I think I have an icon request/suggestion. You should totally make a Ben the Dark Lord icon. That would be awesome. =D
DrWorm: democrats suckdrworm on June 6th, 2004 08:08 am (UTC)
The moral of the story, children, is that evil people who try purposely to do evil suck at it. Evil people who do evil things because they think they are good things are always far, far more skilled.

I fear Umbridge. I don't fear Voldemort. I sort of want to pat him on the back and say, "Good try, dear. Better luck next time."

Oh, and... done and done:



That's a screencapture from when he lunges at Willard's face, by the way. >_> I wasn't sure whether it'd be recognizable, but it sure is more menacing than cuddly!shoulder!Ben.
Cathryn (formerly catslash)remindmeofthe on June 6th, 2004 08:17 am (UTC)
I sort of want to pat him on the back and say, "Good try, dear. Better luck next time."

I know, he tries so hard. It would be kind of endearing if he didn't irritate me so much.

Yes, that's exactly the sort of icon I had in mind. I especially like the font you used for Ben's name.
diamonds or sherbert or a squirrel with a gun: me like starbucks!fistshaker on June 5th, 2004 04:21 pm (UTC)
i totally caught all the harry/remus as well. i kept leaning over to my friend during their conversations and saying "ya know, harry, we've been dating for quite a while now..."
DrWorm: the truthdrworm on June 5th, 2004 04:28 pm (UTC)
*dies* It's the truth! Oh, all those afternoon walks in the Forbidden Forest... some people might claim they were completely innocent conversations between teacher and student, but they cannot conceal the TRUTH forever.
I'm Ellen "Scrunch" Lyle.hortonhearsawho on June 5th, 2004 04:43 pm (UTC)
Well... you do have to remember that Scabbers is a particularly distressed little man and not really a rat. So, uh, he didn't really have to look at all like one...? That bothered me too.

Amy Homer turned to me at some point and just said, "When did Ron get so ripped?!"

And the conversation while Remus was teaching Harry the Patronus charm? I nearly fell out of my seat. "It's alright if you aren't ready, Harry." and so on and so forth. Wow.
DrWormdrworm on June 5th, 2004 05:06 pm (UTC)
Well... you do have to remember that Scabbers is a particularly distressed little man and not really a rat. So, uh, he didn't really have to look at all like one...?

I know... that's how we're supposed to console ourselves. Rather than admitting that, yeah, they got lazy when it came to normalish rat special effects. (I could see that they were trying to make his design look weird, with the ear tufts and all. But it was so subtle that it was sort of pointless. In a way. I could go on and on about this, so I'll just stop now.)

Amy Homer turned to me at some point and just said, "When did Ron get so ripped?!"

*sporfle* Apparently that's the pastime at the Weasley home during the summer? It's got to do with throwing all those gnomes around or something.

"It's alright if you aren't ready, Harry." and so on and so forth. Wow.

And tonight on episode 573 of "Things That Sound Dirty But Aren't aka Freudian Slips and the Symbolism of the Magic Wand" ...

I think that's partly why I expected a make-out session at the end of that scene. Well, maybe it happened before; Harry looked so disheveled before they even started. (Started working on the charm. No, really. Because that's what was going on.)
I'm Ellen "Scrunch" Lyle.hortonhearsawho on June 5th, 2004 05:18 pm (UTC)
It's like, they were trying to make Scabbers look like a distressed little rat, but just forgot to finish or something. They got the distressed, but not the rat. Right.

*sporfle* Apparently that's the pastime at the Weasley home during the summer? It's got to do with throwing all those gnomes around or something.

Oh, you know. Throwing around gnomes, Weasely Brother Orgies, Quidditch practice...

And tonight on episode 573 of "Things That Sound Dirty But Aren't aka Freudian Slips and the Symbolism of the Magic Wand" ...

But I think the best part was that in the back of my mind I just knew they knew what they were saying. While working on their little charm. Like a nice little teacher and student with no other relationship whatsoever.

I was waiting for more than a make out scene. I was waiting for them to be shown waking up in Remus' room after that scene where Harry saw Peter on the Map. Oh, and the end? I don't believe they mentioned that Remus is a werewolf once. It was just, "People... like me." Poor Remus.
DrWorm: geeks we bedrworm on June 5th, 2004 06:31 pm (UTC)
They got the distressed, but not the rat. Right.

That's it exactly. Thank you.

Throwing around gnomes, Weasely Brother Orgies, Quidditch practice...

I hear that repeated thrusting of the hips builds up the muscles required to keep the naughty bits from being smooshed during Quidditch when you're spending hours with a broomstick jammed between your legs...

I was waiting for them to be shown waking up in Remus' room after that scene where Harry saw Peter on the Map.

Ohhh... don't tease. Now I'll be hoping that scene is on the dvd somewhere. ("Sure Peter's dead. Let's just get rid of this nasty old map and I'll... um... 'comfort' you, Professor.")

I don't believe they mentioned that Remus is a werewolf once. It was just, "People... like me." Poor Remus.

Oh, I know. You could almost hear the twanging sounds as people's heartstrings were plucked raw. Oh, Remus, Remus, Remus. *repeats 50 times "I will not make the obvious (not to mention already expounded upon to death) parallels to AIDs and/or other such communicable diseases. I will not..."*
I'm Ellen "Scrunch" Lyle.hortonhearsawho on June 5th, 2004 06:42 pm (UTC)
I hear that repeated thrusting of the hips builds up the muscles required to keep the naughty bits from being smooshed during Quidditch when you're spending hours with a broomstick jammed between your legs...

HAHAHAHA! That is just... that is the funniest thing ever... anyway.

Now I'll be hoping that scene is on the dvd somewhere.

There's a little (rather large) part of me that believes that it was there, and I was just in shock so I don't remember it happening. Maybe... Possibly? We all know they wanted to, and we all know we wanted them to, and I don't CARE if it's a movie for small children. Because there was nothing about that movie that was appropriate for small children.

*repeats 50 times "I will not make the obvious (not to mention already expounded upon to death) parallels to AIDs and/or other such communicable diseases. I will not..."*

I hadn't even gotten so far as AIDS, I was just thinking of Kindly Little Gay Man and then stopped because it got too sad. And and and. [wibble][explodes with Remus Love]
DrWorm: homowhateverdrworm on June 5th, 2004 07:12 pm (UTC)
HAHAHAHA! That is just... that is the funniest thing ever

Can I help it if I worry about these things? I honestly don't think Harry will ever be able to have children now... not that that's exactly a concern, considering where I prefer to stick him.

I just wonder how many wizards ended up impotent... you know, because they weren't doing their thrusting 'exercises.' (Well, Arthur sure didn't have any trouble, as the Weasley brood proves. Maybe that's what's really pissing Lucius off...)

There's a little (rather large) part of me that believes that it was there, and I was just in shock so I don't remember it happening.

That could be it. It was a long movie. And my relative squeeing may have just knocked me out after a bit. So maybe we just missed them. Somehow. >_> Let's go back and check. Frame by frame. It's in there somewhere, dammit.

Because there was nothing about that movie that was appropriate for small children.

If I had any small children, which I do not, I would not have taken them to see Harry Potter. I guess other parents are more willing to put up with were... werething nightmares than I am.

I hadn't even gotten so far as AIDS, I was just thinking of Kindly Little Gay Man

"Kindly Little Gay Man." I love it. And, yeah, I've been torturing Remus with the AIDs theory for years now. But I've seen fan essays and things renouncing that idea... I think because most people assume that you have to immediately connect to teh G4Y, omg stop ruining our canon! Which is just stupid. I think the whole connection lies in that the disease (and the 'curse') is transmitted primarily by an act between someone who is infected and someone who isn't. The act in question being sex for HIV/AIDs and a bite for werewolf...ism. There are other ways to transmit both, of course, and Snape even mentions a biggie in the movie: birth. Apparently, you can be born a werewolf (presumably if one or both parents is already a werewolf) just as a child can be born HIV positive.

I could go on and on about this too, so I think I should just stop here.
I'm Ellen "Scrunch" Lyle.hortonhearsawho on June 6th, 2004 10:51 am (UTC)
(Well, Arthur sure didn't have any trouble, as the Weasley brood proves. Maybe that's what's really pissing Lucius off...)

I think you're definitely on to something. I've always wondered how they could possibly stand to ride those things, even with the invisible cushions (I was quite relieved to read in that Quidditch Through the Ages thing that there were, in fact, little cushions, but still).

Let's go back and check. Frame by frame. It's in there somewhere, dammit.

I think we must, because it has to be there. Perhaps there's just one little frame of them in bed, and everyone is too distracted with their brains going, "WOAH! That's a little inappropriate!" to even notice. I would so go through the entire thing looking for it.

If I had any small children, which I do not, I would not have taken them to see Harry Potter. I guess other parents are more willing to put up with were... werething nightmares than I am.

Are you positive there aren't any MiniYous running about? They can be quite sneaky, you know. I've had a nightmare about dementors, before I even saw the movie, and I never have nightmares. I think I probably would have died if I saw this when I was small. And Werething is correct. Because, you know, werewolves don't look like wolves or anything.

and Snape even mentions a biggie in the movie: birth.

Hang on, Snape mentioned being able to be born a werewolf? Woahhh were was I? (Hang on, that was a stupid question. I was probably hyperventilating because Snape was on the screen.) That's interesting.

I can't believe I hadn't made that connection before, and managed to avoid rabid fanfights on the subject, as I'm sure there have been plenty. (And if we must be canon about such things, Remus has no sexuality that we know of, so neyah.) But, you know, You Can Only Get HIV/AIDS If You're A Gay Man, silly. How dare you think any differently?!!!!!???!?!?!?! Horrible people. I will not allow myself to start on this. nope...

[cuddles Remus forever]
Peteglorybox on June 6th, 2004 11:36 am (UTC)
Gary Oldman did a good job, but I still hate Sirius.

I haven't seen the film, but I hear that. I love Gary Oldman. I will always love Gary Oldman. But I fucking hate Sirius Black. And I was very very happy when he died in Book...uh...Five? Or Six. Shit-for-memory.

I'm glad to hear that David Thewlis was good as Remus because like you, I had my heart set on Jeremy Irons. I love that man. Getting off-topic for a second, have you ever seen David Cronenburg's "Dead Ringers", based off of a Bari Wood novel called "Twins"? If not, you MUST go and track it down. Jeremy Irons playing a pair of psychotic twins in love with each other= one damn good movie. (oh, and the book's pretty damn good at that as well) Even so, god help me, I still probably won't like Lupin. I don't know why. I just never liked him for some odd reason.

Speaking of in-movie!Hermione, I had a feeling she'd end up as a kick-butt Strong Woman type girl, and that depresses me greatly. She was enough of a role-model for small children when she just herself and not a tiny little warrior, goddammit! But then, no one listens to me.

All right, my biggest gripe is with how they did Scabbers. Isn't it sort of exasperating that, while they can do such a beautiful job animating something like Buckbeak, they have such a tough time creating a convincing rat? I have nothing against puppets; they used puppets in Willard. But they also used CGI and REAL RATS. So Willard LOOKS LIKE IT'S A MOVIE FULL OF REAL RATS. Scabbers looked so fake. I was so ashamed.

...oh great. They fucked up the rat. With a movie with a huge-of-a-budget as this one, they fucked up the rat?! "Willard" had probably a nothing-budget compared to POA and the rats in there, be they puppets, CGI or godforbidREALRATS all looked seamless and beautiful. But to use only a little puppet rat...oh I'm going to be throwing shit at the IMAX screen when I go to see this. I know I will be. Goddammit.

I probably have more to say; I just don't know it yet. My brain's fucked up pretty badly again today: my grandmother died today.

At least I've started on taking dumb Jonesy/Famke pictures for you, me, and the Lew. That's one good thing.
DrWorm: unreasonabledrworm on June 6th, 2004 01:15 pm (UTC)
But I fucking hate Sirius Black. And I was very very happy when he died in Book...uh...Five? Or Six.

He died in Book Five. Six has yet to come out, and Remus is probably up on the chopping block. ;__; I fear. But, yeah, I cheered when I realized it was Sirius who was going to kick the bucket. I knew before I finished because someone told me, "You'll be happy while everyone else is sad." Yeah. I don't care if I'm bound for fandom Hell, I hate him.

And I have seen Dead Ringers... yes, it is so amazing. Mmmmguh at the beautifully incestuous Jeremy twins. I'm glad to hear that you saw him as Remus too. Even my mother (who was a fan of Jeremy Irons for many, many years), when she finally got around to reading the books, said he was born to play that part. Unfortunately, he just didn't get to.

Hermione ended up seeming, like, more than perfect... we don't even get to see her break down with the stress of all those classes... so she is, like, Superchild or something. It's disheartening.

But to use only a little puppet rat...

A cheap little puppet rat. With little ear-fluffies stuck on. I was so sad. Whenever Ron's holding it, you can see the little unnatural, jerky head movements.

*hugs to you and your mom* I'm sorry about your grandmother. I wish I could do more for you. If you want an anteater picture, I can definitely attempt one (dude, "Antubis?" Priceless. Just... Priceless).

At least I've started on taking dumb Jonesy/Famke pictures for you, me, and the Lew.

Awww, thank you. Shoot, I've got to get in touch with him. I have no idea what's going on, and he'd better be mostly all right. At least. Or I'll have to be sad. ;__; Goddammit. Stupid boys.
The protector of italian virginityetiolate on June 7th, 2004 12:15 am (UTC)
you girls and your lust for poor little underage daniel radcliffe