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31 October 2008 @ 09:13 pm
Now my heart feels like a mouthful of sores  
I think I would like to keep this "undeadjournal" thing. Deadjournal was pretty lame, but Undeadjournal... clearly in today's zombie-saturated culture there is a place for that.

What is happening with you on Halloween? I am staying in. Rachel is going to some party and coming home. I am like, no parties please, I have problems. Also I have to drive back to Kent sometime in the next few days, which is kind of like... I need to start making that transition and stuff, but I'm so lazy and nervous.

Let's see... I donated $25 to Obama a day or two ago because I wasn't sure I would be able to be home to vote. But I think I will be. I've been avoiding thinking about going home and that's bad of me. But the drive is five and a half hours and I hate the whole transition. Also, once I get home, my dad is going to be leaving for a few days, and I'm not really looking forward to being alone and isolated--since I haven't been alone and isolated like that for about five months. But I have to go home to take care of the cats. Also, I sort of want to leave, because the more I'm around people who are constantly stoned, the more annoyed, unhappy, and stressed I become.

Speaking of stoned people, it looks like Sammi has spent all of her loan money already and so doesn't have any for rent. I don't know. These guys keep coming and banging on our door (a week ago and then yesterday and today), telling her that she needs to go talk to the landlady. I'm pretty sure that she could have done so today, right after they came. But she didn't. Nor does she seem particularly concerned about it. I don't get it, but then... I don't know. I don't get smoking pot every day. She took some Xanax a couple of nights ago and Jason, whom she's currently sleeping with, ended up leaving because she had a goldfish memory that made it impossible to have a conversation.

It's weird because I don't mind drugs, but I am freaked out by this blatant avoidance of reality and the future. It's more than self-medicating. I mean, I guess she has mild anxiety problems and has some prescribed medication for that, but she doesn't see a counselor or anything and who knows how all of her medications are interacting with all her drugs. I think it freaks me out because I'm often at (what I consider to be) a fairly low level of functioning as a practical human being. But Sammi is actually less practically functional than I am in a lot of ways, which just blows my mind. I thought I was too escapist and on the run from reality? I am down-to-earth in comparison. I'm fairly certain than she goes to class less than I ever did, which is incredible. I'm horrified and fascinated and just waiting to see what happens with her classes and living situation. Rachel, on the other hand, can't wait to leave and take her phone (which Sammi uses constantly) and then tell everyone who calls that she doesn't know anyone by that name.

Anyway. I wrote some thing about achieving verisimilitude in writing. It's sort of aimed toward Man From U.N.C.L.E. fandom, although I was actually thinking more about how it applies to original work (lol "real" writing) and I grimaced quite a bit at having to use examples from my own fanfic. It's dorky, but you can read it with non-dorky intentions. Or dorky ones, if you like.

Speaking of Man From UNCLE: Robert Vaughn aka Napoleon Solo wrote a book about his life! And judging from reactions I've read it sounds both amazing and terrible! I'm actually quite glad that xjestx read it and reported back, just because I'm not sure I trust anyone else in this fandom to actually say that it sucks in mind-boggling ways.
 
 
Current Mood: tiredtired
Current Music: Take it from me, a guy who has mouth sores...
 
 
 
Adamadamchristopher on November 1st, 2008 05:05 am (UTC)
i'm just staying at home alternately doing homework and trying to avoid it. it's horrible being around people who are fucked up on drugs all the time, it's very draining bearing witness to the ongoing, cumulative drama and self-destruction.