Peggy's Mom: Less, if you're a cricket.
-- Peggy's parents, discussing Peggy's brother Fran's drowning his crickets"
"O, sandwich maker from Bob!" He pronounced. He paused and furrowed his brow with pious contemplation. "Life will be a very great deal less weird without you!"
Arthur was stunned. "Do you know," he said "I think that's the nicest thing anybody's ever said to me."
--- Mostly Harmless, by Douglas Adams
"I do not know what to do with this new information."
-- Carolyn, after solving an insanely complex problem and getting three
"We don't have time to be dead! We have to study!"
-- Ami, in Sailor Moon, sounding suspiciously like an Urusla student
I can levitate birds. No one cares.
"There. That's the Great Seal of England. Don't lose it. Without the seal, there's no more England and we'll all have to pack up and go back to Normandy."
-- King Henry in Becket
"Why can't they have gay people in the army? Personally, I think they are just afraid of a thousand gay guys with M16s going, 'Who'd you call a faggot?'"
-- John Stewart
"I like anarchy, but it's kind of hard to enforce."
-- Brian Westley
"History does not always repeat itself. Sometimes it just yells, 'Can't you remember anything I told you?' and lets fly with a club."
-- John W. Campbell
"I always wanted to be somebody. I guess I should have been more specific."
-- Lily Tomlin
Courtney: Dude! This person is such a freak! They have a rubber chicken that they carry everywhere they go, and they have a picture of it on their webpage!
Critter: Courtney, have you ever seen your web page?
Courtney: Oh, right.
-- a conversation between Courtney and Critter (*surprisingly enough, I think I know this guy. His name is Kevin and he used to go to my schoo before, in a highly unprecedented move, he graduated. That chicken was involved in a great deal...)